An IITian's cape...
A bit of context. I was on a flight that was *supposed* to leave the new-and-improved Bengaluru airport at 8 PM for Kolkata. However, with the crew probably out for a Saturday night show of Boyle’s latest, it was 11 PM before Jet Airways decided that it was just easier to send us on our way than listen to us moan and groan about impending marriages, connecting flights and other trivialities. Anyway, we are finally on our way by the time we were supposed to reach and we are thankful for that. After a pleasant canter to Kolkata, we return back to Bengaluru because unsurprisingly, it had become too foggy to land in Kolkata by the time we reach.
As soon as we get off the plane, the Jet Airways staff is surrounded by my none-too-happy fellow passengers. A nice, elderly gentleman threatens to beat the staff up. Another rather dapper lady is loudly (and in excellent English, I might add. No really, not being sarcastic this time) threatening to disclose her identity if her demands are not met. Presumably, she has Jane Doe written on her ticket rather than her name. However, they are all rudely interrupted in their midnight exercise by a rather short and startlingly mouse-like female who screams for quiet and makes everyone shut up and listen to her.
Now it goes kind of like this-
(Everyone staring at her expectantly. Madam is dragging someone towards the crowd, presumably her husband. However, the dude is putting up a fierce resistance.)
Madam- “My husband”(My suspicions were right!)
Jet staffer-“Yes,madam?”
Madam-“My husband, my husband here..”(pointing to him vigorously, with the dude still trying to extricate himself from her)
Madam-“My husband here, he is an IITian!!!!!!!”
Everyone in stunned silence. After a minute, they all burst into rapturous applause.
Or at least that is what she expected. Not getting her desired reaction, she proceeds to explain the power of being an IITian to the ignorant and irreverent crowd.
Madam (now jabbing at the Jet staffer with her free hand. Her other hand was holding her IITian husband’s arm)-“My husband can bring your entire company down! He is going to use his IIT alumni network to destroy Jet Airways!”
By now the IITian husband is shaking his head vigorously and denying these powers, mumbling “no,no,nothing like that” repeatedly. Probably just being modest.
Madam-“My husband is going to reach Naresh Goyal right now and have him woken up through his alumni network!”
IITian husband is close to fainting. He has become visibly red and has finally managed to free himself from her. He walks away and sits down on an airport trolley.
Madam delivers a parting shot- “You see what he does to all of you!” and proceeds towards him.
This madam spends the nest 5-6 hours walking up and down and screaming at the Jet Airways staff. At one stage she tries to go and lie down on the runway. Much to her consternation, they don’t let her. In the end, she and her followers(she has gained a fan following by now, as you would expect) block all the Jet Airways counters for a couple of hours and don’t let anyone check-in for any flight. She is finally removed by security and placed next to her husband.
Poor thing. In the end, she was completely let down by her good-for-nothing IITian husband, who refused to use his miraculous powers for their benefit. She really didn’t know, did she? We IITians are omnipotent only when we wear our secret IIT cloaks which all of us make in our first year chemistry labs. And we use those only to save the world, not for trivial things like delayed planes, thank you very much.
A bit of context. I was on a flight that was *supposed* to leave the new-and-improved Bengaluru airport at 8 PM for Kolkata. However, with the crew probably out for a Saturday night show of Boyle’s latest, it was 11 PM before Jet Airways decided that it was just easier to send us on our way than listen to us moan and groan about impending marriages, connecting flights and other trivialities. Anyway, we are finally on our way by the time we were supposed to reach and we are thankful for that. After a pleasant canter to Kolkata, we return back to Bengaluru because unsurprisingly, it had become too foggy to land in Kolkata by the time we reach.
As soon as we get off the plane, the Jet Airways staff is surrounded by my none-too-happy fellow passengers. A nice, elderly gentleman threatens to beat the staff up. Another rather dapper lady is loudly (and in excellent English, I might add. No really, not being sarcastic this time) threatening to disclose her identity if her demands are not met. Presumably, she has Jane Doe written on her ticket rather than her name. However, they are all rudely interrupted in their midnight exercise by a rather short and startlingly mouse-like female who screams for quiet and makes everyone shut up and listen to her.
Now it goes kind of like this-
(Everyone staring at her expectantly. Madam is dragging someone towards the crowd, presumably her husband. However, the dude is putting up a fierce resistance.)
Madam- “My husband”(My suspicions were right!)
Jet staffer-“Yes,madam?”
Madam-“My husband, my husband here..”(pointing to him vigorously, with the dude still trying to extricate himself from her)
Madam-“My husband here, he is an IITian!!!!!!!”
Everyone in stunned silence. After a minute, they all burst into rapturous applause.
Or at least that is what she expected. Not getting her desired reaction, she proceeds to explain the power of being an IITian to the ignorant and irreverent crowd.
Madam (now jabbing at the Jet staffer with her free hand. Her other hand was holding her IITian husband’s arm)-“My husband can bring your entire company down! He is going to use his IIT alumni network to destroy Jet Airways!”
By now the IITian husband is shaking his head vigorously and denying these powers, mumbling “no,no,nothing like that” repeatedly. Probably just being modest.
Madam-“My husband is going to reach Naresh Goyal right now and have him woken up through his alumni network!”
IITian husband is close to fainting. He has become visibly red and has finally managed to free himself from her. He walks away and sits down on an airport trolley.
Madam delivers a parting shot- “You see what he does to all of you!” and proceeds towards him.
This madam spends the nest 5-6 hours walking up and down and screaming at the Jet Airways staff. At one stage she tries to go and lie down on the runway. Much to her consternation, they don’t let her. In the end, she and her followers(she has gained a fan following by now, as you would expect) block all the Jet Airways counters for a couple of hours and don’t let anyone check-in for any flight. She is finally removed by security and placed next to her husband.
Poor thing. In the end, she was completely let down by her good-for-nothing IITian husband, who refused to use his miraculous powers for their benefit. She really didn’t know, did she? We IITians are omnipotent only when we wear our secret IIT cloaks which all of us make in our first year chemistry labs. And we use those only to save the world, not for trivial things like delayed planes, thank you very much.
posted by Akshat Jain at 8:26 AM
3 comments
